A verse I rewrote – the writer liked the ideas and concepts in their verse, but needed some help. It was an upbeat tune so I used a simpler flow with faster paced lines.

Original

So-why do I have such an impact
When everyone else ignored
Well lemme tell you
It’s cause I’m feelin’ myself
And not only that I’m feelin’ everybody else // Man
All I want is y’all to stand up
All I wants to feel good
Success starts up in my mind
But it’s spreadin’ to my hood
Then it’s rockin’ the whole T-dot
Art shows to parking lots
Take my city’s celebrations
Movin’ ass across the nations (heh)
Oh, you left out? Maaaaaaaan….
You been dizzy and busy in society’s misery
Lyrically- feelin’ Drizzy, is we // connecting
How many? // talented
Fishes in the sea,
Deliv’ring inefficiently?
Don’t you see // you
Can’t succeed
When Authority never teach 
what you muh’fuckin’ need
But you’d avoid all of the bleed
With one thing
And that’ is

Rewrite

Spread my hood to the whole damn world // So
Much faster than I first imagined
Might be dizzy from spinin so quick but
I want everyone up and standin
Dancin romaaancin and
Feelin good and whole man
Impact not ignored man
Sensing with that soooul, man
It’s all on me branchin
Findin my method for connection
All around, surround myself // with a
Wealth of respected introspectionists
– Start with the TDot
Celebrate with everything we got
Passion and action -yeah-
Go and keep it lastin